Chapters 2 and 3 discuss the notion of Interpersonal Communication and Self, as well as Perception. Think back to three major events (or times) in your life that you think contributed to your self-concept and self-esteem. Describe these events in detail and explain why you think they helped to shape part of who you are.
If possible, use some terms and ideas from the chapters that helps to illustrate and explain why these events had such profound effects on you.
Have a great weekend! I've thoroughly enjoyed the first week with you all!
Prof Tucker
3 comments:
Lately this year me and my bestfriend have been having a lot of disputes due to the fact we have different beliefs on certain things. It's always very fustrating whenever we have serious discussions because we are both very stubborn and never want to reciporcate or hear the other persons arguement.
Last year of prom 09 one of my best friends girlfriend went to prom with another guy and my friend was so torn up about it. SO being a good best friend i let him vent to me and ofcourse his perception was negative due to the fact he didnt like the guy. I had to spend days of explaining to him that it might not be as bad as he thought it was, realizing that we had two completely different perceptions on how we saw the situation i gave up.
For the longest time I've known this guy and he always been very outspoken and a tough guy. So i would never have thought that he would turn out to be a homosexual. When i found this information out, I was very appauled. It was such a shock to me because when i think of a homosexual guy i think of very femenine type of attitude you know? So i guess thats why you should never stereotype people.
When people are younger, they really don’t care much about how others see them or how they are perceived by others. It’s only when they reach adolescence that they start to really see others and themselves. During my transition from a child to adolescence, my self-esteem really went down due to me seeing my weight as a serious issue. I felt I wasn’t as good as others and always thought the other guy was better than me in everything. During this time I was homeschooled and I didn’t have many to compare myself to except those few I hung out with outside the home at church groups and in the neighborhood along with those I witnessed on TV and movies so needless to say my ideas about the way people responded to others based on their weight was biased. Once I went to middle school and tried out for sports, I realized that my weight was a good thing especially when I played football and wrestled. In those arenas, weight and mass was a thing to be envied, and I soon found my self-esteem to rise and now I really don’t care what people think about my weight.
I used to be very, very closed minded to criticism due to the fact that the majority of it came from my mother who for a long time was my teacher as well. It used to hurt me a lot because she is the type of person who doesn’t knows how to say something nice or give constructive criticism even though she thinks she does. For the first few months after I started to attend public school, I found myself closing my mind off from what my teachers said to me regarding things that I got wrong on tests and quizzes until one of my newly acquired friend pointed it out to me. Once they did, I realized I was doing the same thing I had done with my mother, but I knew now that I should watch out for it because it was only hurting me now that I didn’t get those answers right. My friend had pointed out something in the second box of my Johari Window, the blind self.
I have always been interested in music and when I was younger; I was involved in the church choir, but opted out of continuing with it to pursue aspirations in theatre. It did involve singing and I liked the singing parts I had but no one ever said I was a good voice. When I used to sing at home my mother even used to say I needed singing lessons so I stopped singing around people because I was self conscious about it. It wasn’t till my sophomore year in high school that I started to sing in public again. A group of us were waiting for a friend to walk home with us when a freshman named Bobby came up. He was friends with another guy there and was asked why he was still at school after hours. Bobby said that he was staying after for a chorus program. His response made some of us laugh, but he didn’t pay any mind to it. One of the guys asked him to sing something and as he began to sing I felt the sudden urge to sing with him because it was one of my favorite songs. Bobby saw that I was taking over the harmony so he moved to the melody and something happened there that made me feel right at home with singing. After the chorus was done, Bobby told me that I had a really good voice and that I should be in chorus because they needed more male vocals. At first I thought he was crazy but after I went home, I really thought about it and was seriously considering joining the choir the following year. A few weeks pasted and Bobby and I became friends. Soon after, the chorus department was sponsoring a talent show similar to that of American Idol and Bobby urged me to try out. I was skeptical at first but at the last minute I decided to go for it and surprising enough, I made the top ten finalists and was able to perform on stage in from of my peers at the big competition; So one person’s positive feed back can really have a big influence on a person’s self concept. He really changed my attitude toward singing and my belief in myself.
What three major events shaped the self-concept I have about myself? So many things have shaped the way I look at myself. It’s going to be hard to narrow everything down, but I will do my best to make this short and sweet. I hate speaking in front of a class. No matter how much I prepare myself for the big event when I get in front of the class I always have a break down. I remember the first class presentation I ever gave. I was in the fifth grade. The day of the presentation I had no fear. I went to class everybody was there. I believe the class total was twenty or twenty five. My last name starts with an “S,” I was always last to go. The smartest girl in our class, or that’s what I thought, was before me. She was the head safety patrol person. I just knew her presentation was going to be good all the teachers loved her. She walked up to the front of the class. I was waiting for her to start speaking when. She dropped her papers then she went to the floor after them. As she stood up I noticed she was crying. The young girl, I don’t remember her name, began to shot the f bomb. This was stupid and she didn’t know why she had to do it. She ran out of the classroom still crying and the teacher went after her. I wasn’t scared at any point until now. Watching that scared me to death. That was a major event that contributed to my self-esteem or at least speaking in front of a class esteem.
Another major time in my life started in high school. I was fourteen when I learned how to box. That gym became hard for me to get to without a car. After a year of boxing I need to find a new gym. A Muay Thai gym opened up within walking distance to my home. Mr. Tray the owner active Navy Seal really took me under his wing. He opened the gym up for me. I could go there anytime and train, hang out, or shoot the breeze with him. Needless to say, I spent a lot of time there and became very good at Mauy Thai. I became an instructor. I was introducing my favorite thing to do to people that wanted to learn what I knew. That just took me to new heights in self confidence. People wanted to train with me so I could make them better.
Finally, the last event that continues to shape my self-concept even to this day was the birth of my son. I have had a great life. I want to continue to have a great life but want my son to have a great life too. Maybe that doesn’t make sense let me try again. I didn’t care about much. I didn’t care weather I lived or died. I would put myself in situations that were scary. If you weren’t scared you weren’t human. No matter what my friends may say. The birth of my son took me out of those situations and put me in a classroom. Through a lot of hard work I have found that I can do this. I can get my education. Me! I Can! Wow! That has been the underlining moment in my life so far. I’m proud to say, after this summer semester I will need to complete four classes to get my A.S. in Business. Yeah!!! Thank God, to everyone that supported and continues to support me. I can’t thank these special people enough. I am truly blessed!!!
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